so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize