Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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