I am in a vortex of obligation.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Randomize
