I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
