i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Randomize
