So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
