Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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