i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
