I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
