Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
