yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize