so let's talk penis.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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