need another drink. this is the easiest way
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I need water and some morals
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
