She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
