i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
home. puking in laundry basket.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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