Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
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