Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
