and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
