im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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