Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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