I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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