? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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