I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
