Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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