just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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