i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
