**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize