Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
