oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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