That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
