whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
