I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
