His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
