He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Randomize
