i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
