My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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