How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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