Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
