So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Randomize
