nut hugger
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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