do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Randomize
