did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
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