I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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