Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I can't put those talents on a resume
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
