Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
