did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
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