dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Randomize
