Whod you bang
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
