The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
