I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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