I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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