Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
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